And now…

…We have arrived at the point in the weekend where I attempt to see how many tasks I can perform concurrently so I can claim productivity. I actually don’t feel like this mostly-low-key weekend was anything but necessary, and am more concerned that I may have overextended myself in the week ahead. I have at least two commitments every evening until Friday, which has only one (so far). I hope the rain and my busy schedule and my new early-morning routine will all lend themselves to early bedtimes and easy sleeps.

I spent most of the last two days in Joshua’s company, and we had a lot of fun. We played wii games and phone app games together and against each other and went to the movies. I sometimes catch myself feeling like I’m failing him somehow by only being me, and not being or providing him with a grownup boy-type person who will do things with him and be things to him that I’m not. It doesn’t happen often, but when it hits, it has the potential to make me feel a little lonely for someone like that for me, too. I typically don’t dwell on it for very long – one of the benefits of hanging with a kid with ADHD is that you can’t really brood, since the next topic is coming at you before melancholy can set in. It certainly doesn’t change my current resolve around relationships, but it does make me take a moment to consider all the reasons I am, and Joshua and I are, just me and just us. And once I take the larger picture into consideration, I know things are just the way they’re meant to be right now.

And right now, I need to get banana bread in the oven before the laundry-changing alarm goes off. I’ll leave you with this vision of adorableness that is a happy kid before his first ever IMAX experience. He agreed that it was epic.


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