I sure do love my Richard. He’s a fabulous blend of therapist, cheerleader, life coach, and astrologist. We had a lot to talk about tonight, but somehow managed to cover it all. It always amazes me when that happens.
People always find it interesting that my therapist is a man, and I always think it’s funny that they’re surprised. I feel like a female therapist would liken me too much to herself, whether she was straight or queer, and chances are that I would not be much like her in either case, so my treatment might not be as effective. I also feel that women are, for the most part, very competitive with one another, and I have to frequently check in with myself to make sure I’m not measuring myself against every woman I meet. It’s gross, but true.Â One thing I really appreciate about my relationship with Richard is that, while I’m always excited to report to him when I’ve done things I know will earn me a “yay,” I don’t feel guilty if I don’t do things he’s suggested, or if I do things I know he doesn’t believe are best for me. I don’t feel judged, by him or myself, or like I need to compare my actions to what he would or wouldn’t have done.
Which leads to another reason a male therapist (who may or may not be gay, but who I think of as being gay) is best for me: it is the least likely demographic for transference. Given the number of dynamics I experience in the relationships that meet the most of my needs, there are plenty of opportunities for someone who even remotely falls into a category of potential attraction to embody some of the traits I am drawn to, particularly in a situation where one person is perceived to have power or authority over another, such as any clinical setting.
In business news, my Moo cards shipped today! Richard asked me to provide him with a few so he can recommend my services, which feels really good because I know he’s not just saying it – he’s read quite a bit of my writing and complimented the style beyond the content that was relevant to my sessions. He also told me about the Vet Center right down Stevens Ave from him; I hoped they might be open before or after my regular work hours, but then I remembered that we receive an annual bank of paid volunteer hours, and I could inquire about holding a half day session every so often during which I could assist vets with resumes, cover letters, even essays and papers if they’re continuing their education. I wouldn’t charge, obviously, since Martin’s Point would be paying me, and I even got to thinking about our member base of vets and their families – I may be able to advertise my services through work, sure, but what if there was an opportunity for a grant from the organization to provide this sort of assistance to our members as a perk of being part of one of our plans? The thought is only half-baked at this point, but it’s startin’ to smell kinda good….. :)